nimby

Photo by: Tampen


... not in my backyard ...

or, more accurately, in my backyard, in my building, in my neighbourhood ...

This neighbourhood was sketchy when I moved here almost five years ago to go to Ryerson. (Hard to believe it has been that long.)

But lately, its dark side has been weighing heavily on my mind.

The transvestites that come out late at night on the short block of Homewood have, over the years, been getting scarier and scarier. In fact, when I first moved here they were dressed to the nines and passed easily for 'ladies' of the night.

Now, assuming they are different people -- but perhaps not -- they are emaciated and desperate-looking. I know this because I return home from work around 2:30 a.m. and drive by them every night to get into my building.

I have a particular image in my mind I can't shake. Weeks ago, on a particularly bitterly cold and windy winter night, I turned a corner and a man stepped out in front of my car, his thin long coat held open to reveal a thinness barely covered by a bikini.

Last weekend, while walking down my building's stairwell as a form of exercise, I made it half way down when I came across someone sleeping on a landing.

There are condos going up in the neighbourhood, but in contrariness, the street people seem worse off. Recently, police arrested almost 300 in a sweep of Cabbagetown. In the process, they seem to have swept up the local beggars, too.

More and more I find myself wanting to get out of the city. That's sad. I feel guilt about it, too -- as if I'm closing my eyes and taking the easy way out.

I don't know where I'm heading to either at this point, though I feel like Toronto is a transition to somewhere. Somewhere green and idyllic and romantic? Is such idealism even socially responsible? It all nags at me and I don't have any neat answers for how cruel life can be for many people.

On another note, however, friends called on Friday and we spent a lovely afternoon and evening yesterday -- went to the Gardiner Museum of Ceramic Art and then to the cinema to see Run, Fat Boy, Run -- a very funny movie that made me laugh out loud. Priceless things I really needed -- friendship and laughter -- still in this backyard.

I need to keep the friendship and laughter but will probably have to get a new backyard.